Ze jellyfish bids adieu!

My beloved readers and fellow bloggers,

I have decided that this will be my final entry. Yes, I will officially stop blogging. It had been a year and a couple of months, and believe me it had been fun sharing out my thoughts with you. Thanks for your lovely comments; they had cheered me up a lot during those moments of solitude.

You might be wondering why, right? I don’t really know. I probably got tired of the whole blogging thing, or maybe I just realized that what I am going through, my thoughts and experiences are not really blog material. My life is a very tiring routine really. There are other things out there far more interesting, Brangelina probably?

I know I still owe you tons of entries, particularly the Istanbul trip. But I feel so tired at the moment and uninspired that I can get my ass to post it. But come to think of it, I think I never posted the details of the trip because it had become one of those memories that are too precious to be shared. Call me selfish but I’ve never been that happy and I want to keep the details to myself.

Fellow blogger friends, fret not as I will still drop by your personal blogs. This blog will remain viewable; I will not be taking it down. Some memories are just too precious to discard: a love lost, finally letting go, finding love again, the ups and downs… priceless moments.

This is indefinite, I might not blog again, or I might find the inspiration to start again. Who knows, I am not closing my doors. Or I might just be in a bad mood today, did not sleep well last night; damn AC is taking ages too cool down the scorching villa. Add a terrible headache and a terribly annoying back pain. I think I pulled a muscle/ligament whatever, tsk! The only thing that cheered me up today is David Beckham’s confirmation of Victoria’s pregnancy! Bless them; hope it’s a girl this time.

Anyways, goodbyes should never be this long right? Hehe.

I want to leave; I want to stay. I want to fight; I want to give in. I want to hold on; I want to let go. This life is just probably a mirage in this desert I am in. I do not know where the hell I am going at all. I am delusional, hehe… Yes I am totally misleading you all, eh?

…and the jellyfish is off to find Nemo!

It fits! Yeah!

In my previous entries, I think I had repeatedly mentioned that I am getting quite fat. Not really fat as it’s just my tummy that’s getting huge. The past months, tons of skirts, dresses and pants are just shoved at the back of my closet because they won’t fit.

But ever since I moved into a new place, I started getting into walking. My new place was actually relatively near my office than from where I used to live, but the problem is, no bus passes by my place that goes anywhere near my office. So rather than taking two bus rides, which will take longer, I decided to walk to and from the office.

I was first hesitant as it’s summer here now, and that means 30-40’C, plus high humidity. So what I do is I carry my office clothes in a gym bag, then I walk my way to the office with my sweat pants, baggy shirt, and trainers. I get a little sweaty but morning sweat never stinks anyway hehe. I just freshen up in the office, change to my office clothes, dab some cologne and I’m ready, and looking quite fresh really hehe.

It’s lately that I am seeing the benefits of my daily walk. I have this nice blush in the morning after each walk that stays until midday hehe, lesser breakouts, my legs are getting toned, butt getting firm, and last but most important… tummy’s slimming down! This morning I wore my little black dress, which I haven’t worn for months, and it fits! Yeah!

Plus, I seem to be having a faster metabolism now. I can’t wait for winter, walking then would be much more delightful.

FYI: the distance from my place to office is: 25-30 minutes if it’s brisk walking, and 45-50 minutes walking for a quite leisurely pace.

More updates coming soon...

Guys? Sorry! I know, the Istanbul update is long delayed. Blame Schmuck and the World Cup hehe. He got me hooked. It will be over soon so I can get back to editing the Turkey pictures.

By the way, have I told you I won a beaute hamper from Pierre Cardin? Yeah! It’s 500AED worth of cosmetics. I wouldn’t even spend 200AED for my own make up, so this is actually great! I just entered the competition by mailing my details, and then few days before leaving for Turkey, I received a confirmation that I won! It includes a liquid foundation, compact powder, loose shimmer, bronze blush, mascara, eyeliner pencil, lipstick and a nail polish. Sweet!

Guess what? Schmuck and I will turn a year this end of the month. I know, he never even thought we’d reach 2 months haha! If I am to describe the past year in a word, it will definitely be: FUN. He never ceases to amaze me. We always make each other laugh; he brings out my inner goofball.

Anyway, I’ll be giving you the Turkey updates soon. Ta!

I am back...

Sadly, I am back to the 45'C heat of Dubai... I miss Istanbul already, and its 18'C weather.

Anyways, I know you all want to know everything about the trip. And yes, it was fab! Istanbul is a b-e-a-u-tiful place! Both Schmuck and I fell inlove with it.

But I can't give you the full details yet. After getting back, I moved out my old place and transferred to a friend's place, and up to now i'm still not done with arranging my stuff. Then I arrived to tons of work waiting in the office that had piled up during my absence. Then I rushly finished some article for a friend's mag. So I really haven't got time to really sit down and write.

Will post the chikas of the travel and the pictures soon, promise!

Now back to work for me!

Almost there...

Whew, it’s been a while since I last wrote anything here. Actually I had been itching for days to blog about something that I am so excited about. But you’ve got to give me the credit for not really giving in to the urge of divulging it. I was thinking that telling you all about it when it’s still not confirmed might jinx it. So now, that everything is almost set and moving, let me just say it out loud:

I AM GOING TO ISTANBUL!!!

Yes, guys! Next month, June 15th to be exact, my dear Shmuck and I will be heading to the largest city in Turkey and known as the only metropolis located in two continents (namely Europe and Asia) at the same time. I didn’t get to tell you all about this trip before as we went through a lot before we were able get everything settled. Let me recount the obstacles that we faced:

1. Asking for vacation leave

We initially planned on going to Turkey in late June, since Schmuck was able to schedule his leave from the company at that time. But when I requested my company to let me have my vacation the same date as Schmuck’s, lo and behold my dearly beloved boss said no. He said I could either delay it for another month or advance it for a few weeks. I know Schmuck can’t delay it to July since their company will be too busy already by that time; we both tried our luck asking for permission to have it on from the 9th June until 24th June (2 weeks). I don’t know if it’s fate but we ended up having the same date for our vacation.

2. Hotel preference

We’ve been checking out hotels in Istanbul via the net and it took us a while to actually find the one we want. We wanted a 4-star one, and should be just walking distance to the historical site, i.e., Hagia Sofia, Topkapi Palace, Grand Bazaar, etc. There are lots of hostels and pensions along that area but it’s funny that we both had agreed on staying in a big hotel. Why? Small hostels and pensions offer a homey ambiance, but we don’t want to feel at home? We want to feel like a tourists, for the room to have a tub and room service; therefore, we chose to stay at a hotel, hehe! We picked Best Western President Hotel for: its great location, affordable price, tubs, a small swimming pool and an English pub that airs the World Cup live. Honestly, I don’t know anything about football, but I don’t really mind if he is to spend each night watching matches, I’ll just be right beside him trying out all of Turkey’s local wines! And here’s the funny part, after all the considerations, we found out that the hotel was fully-booked on our chosen dates. So we just booked another hotel, which is quite okay, but without the pool, pub and the football. Imagine our disappointments, but it was only short-lived…

3. Applying for visa

This is where everything almost ended. Friends who have gotten visas from the Turkish Consulate before had told us that it was fairly easy, unlike US or Schengen visa applications. So I called the consulate to inquire about their requirements, which is just the passport plus copies, photo, filled-up application form, and a company/no objection letter. They said other requirements, should they still ask for more, would be based on the applicants’ qualifications. So with all that settled, we confidently applied last Thursday, we waited for hours only to be informed afterwards that they wanted us to submit copies of our bank statements (OK, that’s normally asked for), proof of hotel reservations (OK that’s easy), and “actual” tickets (as in ACTUAL??). They just normally ask for reservation proofs, but asking for actual tickets is kind of mean, what if they decided not to give us visas? There will be charges if we end up canceling it. Oh well, we can’t blame them. Since when did our passports get to be so powerful anyway? Ah! The disadvantages of being born in the third world! Plus, I’ve got to admit that if I am the visa officer, I’ll be wary to since this is Schmuck and mine’s first trip out of the country, not to mention he’s just a year here, and Turkey’s still a European country, would have been easier if we’re applying to another Middle Eastern country.

So we went to our travel agent and ask for our tickets and hotel vouchers to be issued. But I just can’t help but ask him if he can find out if rooms had opened up in the hotel that we initially wanted. And then, viola! It is available on those dates! Imagine our happiness, though not that heartfelt yet since we are still basically denied of a visa but will be reconsidered if we can give them the requirements they want.

We were asked to submit the needed documents last Sunday. We handed him the documents he wanted, waited agonizingly for hours, and then after what seems like eternity, he called us, took our passports, charge us AED 260 each, and gave us back a coupon to claim our passports in two days. We were in awe on how fast it happened. Schmuck and I went out the consulate, stared at each other and then questions suddenly flooded in:

Me: Does that mean our applications were approved?
Schmuck: I don’t know, he didn’t say so…
Me: But he took our passports..
Schmuck: And he ask us to pay..
(Sudden realization…)
And we were both jumping up and down!

Just a few hours ago, I claimed the passports. We were allowed single entry to Turkey! Yeh! Our first European country! Funny how it’s still like 3weeks to go and Schmuck had been planning everything, like when he’s cleaning his place, what stuffs to buy and bring, to whom he’ll leave his place, and other worries. While all I do is read on all info that I can get about that place.. Ohh can’t wait..

Counting the days now...

Schmuck is the sweetest!

Arghh! Pardon the cheesy title, hehe.

How can I ever doubt my dear Schmuck?! If you had read my previous post, you would have read how I ranted about him being not as sweet as before, me feeling not needed blah blah blah? Well, I should have known, it was just my hormones. It’s that time of the month again hehe.

We watched “MI-3” last Friday. I can’t really say it was great as I am not a big fan of Tom Cruise after his couch-jumping stints, but I must say it was okay. The only thing that kept me glued to the screen was Jonathan Rhys-Meyers! I find him hot, hihi! I first fell for him when I watched “Match Point” and from then I kinda developed this growing fondness for him.

Then we had barbecued ribs at Chili’s for dinner, and it was HUGE! Schmuck and I always have a great appetite when we eat, but it’s funny that we never finished it was it was really huge! It was a fun weekend, he’s the sweetest and I do love him dearly (this is still my hormones talking, hehe).

What's up with me lately, Hollywood-style!

It’s been weeks since I had last updated this blog, been busy with work, and not to mention some job seeking, house hunting and a little writing stint for a teen magazine. Schmuck was also sick with flu for a few days, so I had to take care of him, his house and his laundry lol! He’s well now, except for some coughing fits now and then.

But so far I hadn’t had luck with finding a new job, and a new place. I had an interview last week for a PR company but the compensation that they are offering is not that great that I had to say no. I am hoping I’ll get the job I applied for in Qatar. It just seems great to be in a new place again where you know nobody and start again. Yes, I can be a gypsy sometimes.

The place I am staying right now is okay; I like the people I am with, but sometimes you just need to have your own little space and privacy, and you definitely can’t get that when there are 3 of you in a room. Plus I am having a hard time in the morning, as there’s only one bath in the house, and all 7 (3 in our room and 4 in the other room) of us lining up every morning to use the shower. Since I am the one who leaves the house first, I need to be the first one to use the bath, therefore I need to be up by 530am, or else everyone will be late. But unfortunately, I cannot find anything I can afford. Imagine, all I need is a small room for myself, as in a tiny one, that hopefully have it’s own bath, but rooms starts now at 2,000AED, and I can’t definitely afford that. Arghh, bitch!

I have to confess something; I am addicted to Angelina Jolie. I am! I am spending my free time surfing thee net for write-ups about her and photos of her, and yeah the family (Brad, Maddox, Zahara, and the coming baby) too. I just bought a copy of Hello! Magazine that features those exclusive photos of them in Namibia, and Schmuck bought me Lara Croft 1-2 and Girl, Interrupted DVDs, and I had been watching them and the speacial disks repeatedly for the past days. I just love her! Jeez!

Schmuck and I turned 10months last week, yes we’re still together, though it’s kinda waning down a little bit. Probably we’re just too comfortable with each other already that he somehow had lost his being malambing. Probably he thinks he doesn’t need to be affectionate anymore, as I know anyway how much he cares. Or probably he’s just too busy at work that his mind’s always occupied even when he’s with me. Or maybe I just think too much! We eat out a lot, and talk on the phone daily, but sometimes I just feel not needed. Knowing him he’ll say that he doesn’t really need me anyways, he’s a grown boy now. I don’t even want to think nor care about this little frustrations anymore. I’ll just look for a new job, a new place and use Angie as my escape. She’s so carefree; I wanna be like her, lol!

I’m gaining weight, but sad thing my arms and legs are still lanky, and it’s just my tummy that’s getting huge. I look like one of those malnourished kids (big stomach, small frame) that Angie is helping down in Namibia. Yes, baby bumps are so in at Hollywood nowadays, think Angelina Jolie, Gwen Stefani, Maggie Gyllenhaal and probably Britney Spears (still unconfirmed), but mine is pathetic, they are flabs! I need to exercise, as I can’t stop eating lately. Yes I may be thin but I eat like it’s the end of the world tomorrow! I need to get a new place first because my roommates getting annoyed when they see me doing sit-ups or whatever. Even my officemate who doesn’t give a damn about me had already noticed my tummy.

Enough of my ranting, I need to surf for Hollywood gossips. Yes, a dear friend, who is an editor for a teen magazine here, had given me a space in the mag to write some chismis, hihi!

Can’t Angelina and Brad adopt me? I came from a third-world country too, like Madz and Zahara, I can be the kids’ nanny, lol! Okay, maybe I’ll just ask Bryanboy to adopt me, since adoption is also a hype in Hollywood tehse days (say Ewan McGregor), that even that whiner Jen (Brad’s ex), Halle Berry, and (Help us!) Jessica Simpson is thinking of joining in the latest trend.

Oh dear!

Of insomnias, epilation and a panda...

I think my insomnia's back. Why I think so? I normally hit the sack at around 10pm, and it usually takes me around 5-10mins before I finally doze off to dreamland. Then I'm up by 5am, will wait for my alarm (which I set at 5:30am) before I drag myself off to get my caffeine and nicotine fix. But lately it's different, I lie awake until the wee hours of the morning, usually until 2:30-3am, doze off to a bothered, dream-filled sleep, then will be up and awake (no snoozing this time) by 5-5:30am.

Rather than lying down trying to catch that elusive shut-eye, I thought I better make use of the time to do something productive. First I thought I should bring home some stuff from work, but naah, I won’t get anything out of it (I have been longing for that much-awaited salary increase for more than a year now. Then I thought that I should used the extra time to really think about my life, then eventually, rather than sorting out some loose ends, I ended up with a terrible headache, so no more thinking about getting a change of career, moving to another country, needs, wants, disappointments, hang-ups, and relationships.

Then I finally decided to use up all this time, energy, pain, confusion, emotion, imagination and paranoia to my advantage. Last night I started writing again…

* * * * * *

I learned something lately. When your hurting inside, used this time to epilate (or wax if that’s what you prefer), you’ll hardly feel the pain. I have low pain tolerance but somehow I had managed to epilate my legs and underarms during the weekend, and actually enjoyed it.

* * * * * *

I fell asleep last night clinging to an old beanie panda. It was a gift from an ex (when we were still together, that is), and had been sort of my security blanket-cum-comfort zone when we broke up. I had kept it with me even after I had moved on and had been catching dust for sometime now, together with my stuffed Tigger. Last night, after running out of thoughts to carry me on through my insomnia attack, I just felt the urge to hold it again (not even hug it, I’m just clutching its foot), and I finally fell asleep.

Thinking about it now, I realized what happened last night. It is not a case of the “missing the ex” syndrome. It’s more like the beanie was something from my past; I think I had connected it to the comfort of home and the secured feeling of knowing who you are and what you want. I was probably troubled by my doubts about my present state, and definitely wary about the future that I don’t want to think about anymore, that the urge to cling to a past that I know so well seems very comforting.

I think I’ll wash the beanie panda later…

Update: Thanks to Ebudae,I've been looking for the right word to describe the comfort the past gives. Found it hehe, it's "familiarity". I am familiar with the past, familiarity=security! hehe!

Tagged

Tagged! Okay, I was tagged by Marye, and she wants me to write down 7 of my current favorite songs, and then I must tag another seven. Since I am not doing anything, I might as well get down to it.

But since I haven’t been watching any TV or listening to the radio since I got here (yeah, that’s almost two years, though I am updated on Hollywood gossips), I am not familiar with the new songs, bands, or singers that are hitting the charts right now. So my list will basically contain songs that I have gotten used to hearing (and eventually liked) from schmuck’s old collections. My top 7 will be (in no particular order):

1. Moon Over Bourbon Street (Sting) – I just love Sting! I love most of his songs but I kind of fell in love with this one.

2. I Walk Beside You (Dream Theater) – Schmuck always play this one, and since I hear it a lot, I slowly learned the lyrics and then eventually liked it. It was just lately that I knew the title and who sang it. When I found out it was by Dream Theater, I loved the song more, hehe.

3. This Time’s For Real (Ill Nino) – I heard it again from Schmuck, liked it, reminds me of my college days hehe, makes me miss my elephant pants and my almost shaved head hehe.

4. Go Your Own Way (Fleetwood Mac) – Just one of those songs that was being repeatedly played and have accustomed to like hehe.

5-7. Fragile, Seven Days and Message in a Bottle (Sting) – Yes I ran out of artist, so I list another 3 songs from Sting that are always in repeat mode in my player hehe.

I won’t be obliging anyone to follow my suit on this tagging thing, but I’ll name 7 of you anyways: tin (coz I’m curious if she can name just 7 from tons of her fave), balarns (another curiosity), misfit (will it be songs about heartbreaks dear?), patty (hehe miss you pattypie), riel (do still have time for music dear?), mitch (if you too have time for it) and ye (what’s on repeat mode on your new player huh?).

On another note: Holiday tomorrow! Wee! It’s a Muslim Holiday, It’s Prophet Mohammed’s birthday. Yes! I can sleep, sleep and sleep some more.

In my delusional state...

I was just doing my normal lunch time routine: eating last night’s leftover that I have heated in our office’s microwave and reading the day’s tabloid or magazine. Then I came across an article in the career section that hit me like a drench of ice-cold water. It was these particular lines that hit me:

“I think I have missed my calling”
“What is your calling?”
“I have no idea; I just hate to think I was born to do what I am doing now…”

It made me contemplate on my current job. I had realized years ago that I am making a wrong career choice when I took that degree back in college and further made a wrong decision when I took this job. But sometimes, though you know exactly what you wanted to do in life, the type of job that will bring you fulfillment, you just don’t know how to go about having a career change or probably just scared to do it. And before you realize it, it was already too late to make that career shift.

Probably a transferring to a new company can temporarily relieve this itch, or probably a move to another country. As for now, I’ll just have to go about putting up with this until I have enough money (and guts) to leave my secure job and salary to pursue an uncertain dream.

Someday I’ll just be living in the Mediterranean, watching some small fishing boats pass by, as I write my perfect novel. Funny as it may sound to other people but I think I want to be a romance writer, yes, those Harlequin or Mills & Boon-type, hehe. I know they are cheesy but hell, that’s what I want to do, and will make me happy.

As for now, I’ll just go about this tiring routine, but I have my goals to look forward to. Cheers to Dreamland!

Feeling model: Part 2

I like the previous photo better, though Patty and Schmuck liked this one better. Patty loved how artsy it is, while Schmuck likes the "simangot" effect, hehe. This is again taken by ria, and (again) if you are in the Dubai or anywhere near here and want to have your portrait taken by her, contact her at: ria.mendoza@gmail.com and mention my name so you can avail of the discount (wink wink).

Model for a day...

My friend (riel) bought a new camera lens and was itching to use it and at the same time practice taking on location portraits. She asked me to model for her, and me being the camera whore that I am, I willingly agreed. So here's one sample of her work, the rest I will be posting soon.

And if you are in the Dubai or anywhere near here and want to have your portrait taken by her, contact her at: ria.mendoza@gmail.com and mention my name so you can avail of the discount (wink wink).

The birthday that was...

Another birthday had passed. If I was still back home, hanging out with guys around my age or younger, I would probably be feeling way way old already. I felt that way when I turned 21 hehe. But here, turning 24 doesn’t really mean anything. I do not feel old at all, but do not feel young either. When you are dating someone seven years older than you, sometimes you will feel so mature, but most of the time you’ll still feel like a kid.

How’s the birthday? Oh it was okay. Did I sound too plain? Well, the pre-birthday thingy was fun rather than the day itself, which I spent in the office under loads of paperwork. To make it worse; nobody in the office knew it was my birthday so they made me work overtime for another 2 hours.

Okay, let me just tell you about the pre-birthday surprises.

Feb. 17 – yes I now it was way way early for a birthday surprise but schmuck treated me out for lunch at the Intercontinental Hotel. The best lunch ever! No kidding! The green lemon tea at Sumibiya is something to die for, not to mention the rest of the meal.

Feb. 23 – An amazing night of seafood buffet at Dusit Hotel, arranged by Schmuck, attended by my friends. Overflowing wine, lobster tails, prawns, getting tipsy, and best of all, sharing it with beloved friends, and paying just a small percentage of the total bill. Not to mention the Simon’s gift, dried mangoes. Yeah I know, it’s the thought that counts!

But the highlight of that night was schmuck picking me up for the dinner, looking really dressed up (which is rare) in a new, perfect fitting (another rare due to his size) black topman polo, and holding in his hand his gift: a “Chronicles of Narnia” box set. He knows I’ve been itching to have that one. And have I told you about his oh-so-perfect polo? Hehe, can’t get enough of it, he really looks great that night.

But he lost his 2nd gift though. He told me that he still had another gift and that he cannot find it as its small and might have misplaced it. Hearing that it was "small" and hearing him pissed on losing it, I panicked myself because I thought that the gift was "the" gift. You know. Turned out, it was a neutrogena lip balm, though we never found it. Good thing, I thought he lost something expensive.

Feb. 24 – another lunch date courtesy of schmuck (again), which (again) consists of lobster as main course. So what’s our fave food again, kids? Everyone now: lobster!

Feb. 27 – the day itself! Woke up with tons of text messages, which did not stop until late that night. Not to mention the phone calls, friendster msgs, emails, and Ym’s. Thanks guys for all your greetings and making me feel so so loved, thanks everyone! As much as I wanted to mention you all, I do not want to end up forgetting some names, so you guys know who you are. Okay, special shout outs to: hanna, thanks for that unexpected call, marye: for blogging your greetings and ria: for the skirt hehe.

And so the day ended with a dinner of home-cooked nilagang baka by kuya banoy…

To sum it all up, I can just sigh and smile. It was a good one...

This is really a lucky month for me! Remember a few weeks ago I posted an entry mentioning my winning a 5K shopping voucher at IKEA? Well apparently my lucky streak has not fade out just yet.

Two days back, I was just reading the 7days tabloid when I saw a promotional contest for a newly opened Japanese restaurant in the Intercontinental Hotel named “Sumibiya”. They are giving away a lunch/dinner voucher for 4 for anyone who can give the English meaning of the restaurant’s name. Out of curiosity, I searched the net for a translation. But I cannot find any. Though I found a site with the word sumibiya was also written in its Japanese form. So what I did was copy the Japanese form, paste it in one of the online translation sites and there you go! It means “Charcoal Fire House”.

Thinking it must be the right answer as Sumibiya, they said, offers the grill-your-own-food type of dining experience (check out the photo), I sent my answer. And yep, you’ve guessed it! I won! Again! Imagine I’ve won two vouchers already in less than 3 weeks interval.

Remember one of the birthday wishes that I made a few weeks back? (refer to an older posting to view the list): To win any raffle for cash, all expense paid vacations, cruises, or shopping/dinner vouchers. Came true already, right? I was only hoping for one of any of the options (cash, vacation, shopping, dining), but I got two already. This really is a lucky month for me! :)

Valentine's day has beed cancelled...

I received this pic from a friend just now... I can't help but post it. I just find it funny and harsh at the same time hehe. It came with this caption:

Peace at last....

It's about time somebody shot the little shit!

I'm back, so is my sunshine...

I apologize over the sad tone of my previous entry. I was in a bad wreck the time I was writing that down, and I must have really sounded desperate as I received tons of calls and messages asking what happened.

I’m okay now; my sun’s shining again (hopefully it will stay that way for a long, long time). Thanks guys (galo, sara, patty, ria & lovella) for your messages.

And yeah, Schmuck’s mom stopped by Dubai for 10hours on her way back to Saudi last Friday. So we met up with her. I have some new stuffs yey! My mom sent me some make-up through her, and Schmuck’s sisters sent me a nice blouse, some headbands and scoongies, earrings and a book. Yey! Thanks guys, I love them!

Drenched

Rain had been pouring on me lately. It’s okay; I’ve learned to feign cheerfulness even when I’m drenched. I just walk like I don’t care, humming some blues, and at least, as a friend used to say, “nobody notices I’m crying in the rain”.

Am I scared that the rain will not stop and eventually drown me in solitude? It’s a painful thought, and maybe yeah I’m scared. I’ve learned a lot from braving the heavy rains. But I also know that no matter how much you have prepared yourself to the thought that you will eventually drown, it will still hurt, and a lot.

I hope this rain will end, even just for today. I may never know if I will forever have my sunshine beside me, but all I ask of fate is to let my sun’s warmth bathe me longer, because I am not ready to be back in the freezing cold again.

Dearest fate, I had never in my life interfered with your will, I had let your arms take wherever you desire. You have taken me away of my comfort zone before and flew me to the harsh desert. I never complained. I just let you live my life, though inside I am more like dead.

I accepted everything, as I know you always have a way of picking me up from the rain, drying me up, and even letting me have a cup of warm hot chocolate with marshmallows on top. I will forever let you take me wherever you want me to be, but all I ask of you now is to let the sunshine last, if not forever, just a little longer.

Of being lucky and other stuff...

I’m one lucky girl lately. Let me tell you why but first, let’s backtrack to how it happened:

You all know that Schmuck’s dad went here for a couple of days last month, and when he was here, he bought himself a new pda/phone. It just so happened that the store had this promo that day that for a certain amount of purchase, you are entitled to enter the raffle for a gift voucher to IKEA (the best home furnishing store in the whole world, in my unbiased opinion hehe). Since Schmuck works for IKEA, that immediately disqualifies him and his immediate relatives to the raffle, so I ended up filling up the stubs myself. So you all know where this is heading right? Too make this long blabbering short, I WON! No, make it they won; it’s just that it’s under my name so basically I won, though I didn’t hehe.

I received the call two days ago; they said I won a 5,000aed voucher from IKEA! Sweet! Funny when I was filling up that stub, Schmuck’s dad told me he’s a got a good feeling about it. I was always lucky with raffle draws. Back in the Phils, previous winning I have accumulated includes a washing machine, a Sony wi-fi component, groceries, and even shirts hehe.

I remember two instances in college, wherein in both cases, there was a long line of students wanting to get that last slot on a class, so the teacher decided to get all our id’s and raffle the last slot, and what do you know, I got the slot in both cases!

But I was never lucky with sweepstakes, lottos and other games of chance, just raffles hehe. Hey, it just hit me, in my previous blog, I wrote my birthday wishlist and one of them was to win in any raffle, cool! And with regards to my makeup wish, my mom is sending me some thru Schmuck’s mom. Hmmm, wishes coming true, I wonder if my secret wish will be granted…

Anyways, with regards to the winnings, since it was not my purchase, we have decided to divide it, 1k will go to Schmuck’s family, 1k to some friends who I promised to buy some little tokens, and the remaining 3k will be used to furnish Schmuck’s place. I only bedspace so there will be no more space for additional clutter. Scmuck promised to buy me some stuffs though from his share, like some cookwares to send to my mom and maybe some little stuff for me.

* * * * *

I was planning on going to Turkey to celebrate my birthday, just for 3 days, but yesterday I have decided to cancel it. Apparently most of my friends cannot go with me, I wouldn’t want to celebrate my birthday wandering in Turkey alone right?

* * * * *

I am dreading lunch today. This morning while I was cooking my lunch (sausage and egg hehe), I made a little boo boo. As I was frying the egg, I took the saltshaker to sprinkle some salt and stupid little me open the wrong end on the shaker (the big opening and not the “little holes” opening. So you all know what happened, so lunch will be a bit salty later.

* * * * *
I’m having a case of too much of “too much”. You didn’t get me right? Hehe. Well it’s like this, most of the people in here say “too much” too often. It always ends up getting misused actually. It’s like they do not have “very” in their vocabulary. Examples:

- They say: There is “too much” traffic, when it will be better just to say: “The traffic was bad”.
- They say: I am “too much” busy, when it should be: “I am very busy”.

That goes also for: There is too much cold, too much problem, and so on. Come to think of it, they say “how much” in cases when “how many” applies better.

This is too much (wink)... I have to go back to work. =)

Japanese-Themed Birthday Party!

Last January 5, our friend Charles celebrated his birthday by having a Japanese-themed party. So everyone was asked to don any Japanese costume. I wanted to come as a geisha but I cannot find any kimono the last minute so I ended up coming as a Japanese school girl. Schmuck and I had a hard time looking for costume and as it turned out, our last resort which is the kid's section, is where I found my whole costume ensemble.

Schmuck, on the other hand decided to just go as a Japanese commoner, with his improvised kimono (it was a bathrobe hehe) and sock and slippers.

Here as the pics:

Schmuck "the Japanese commoner" (as if he really needs a costume, he looks japanese anyways) and his japanese school girl. I was going for a cross between fook mi/yu in austin power's goldmember and the school girl in kill bill, but everybody ended up calling me britney spears thoughout the evening.

My dearest buddy Simon drunk and rowdy as always!

Memoirs of a Geisha?! Charles (the birthday celebrant), Andy (who looks more like he's from the set of Mano Po) and Herbert (the japanese pokpok)

Question: Why the hell is everybody in the kitchen? Answer: Because that's where the booze is!

Everybody having a blast, Schmuck mixing drinks...

What a rowdy bunch...


The japayuki, Carl "the wagamama-japanese cardinal-queen amidala, and charles the geisha.

It was a fun evening. I don't actually know how they all end up in the morning as Schmuck and I sneaked out to go home when the party got too wild for us. Hmm, with my birthday coming up, what theme should my party be? Curious! Very curious!

Saying my thoughts out loud...

(Me, talking to myself, here are my thoughts...)

• Darn, the 4day holiday passed by without me really feeling it. Blame the PS2! (Kidding babe)
• Yey! Angie's (Angelina Jolie) pregnant. Dunno why I'm happy hehe. I just like them both.
• It's my year! Year of the Dog! A friend used his tarot cards on me a few weeks ago. And boy! The predictions for me this year really blew my hat off! I'm not telling you yet about the predictions, I'll just wait til they come true!
• My birthday's coming up!We'll it's still next month, yet I can't help but feel excited about it. I remember some friends posting their bday wishlist, I was thinking that maybe I'll post mine, to give you guys hints wahahaha! But it won't really be useful for those back home unless you wanna spend a lot having them sent here by courier! (Wink!) Note: Wish list at the end of this post.
• I haven't watched Narnia yet, tsk! We're supposed to watch it this past holidays but again blame the PS2! (Kidding babe!) Actually Schmuck's a little sick, slight fever and back pain, so he's not really in the mood to go out.
• I really have this good feeling about this year! I feel giddy thinking about it!
• I miss my bestfriend (Jan)... Hi bes!
• Just this past week, I've missed 3 weddings! The first one was that of one of my fave cousin on my dad's side, I was supposed to be the bride's maid but I was not able to go home. Tsk! Then there was Je's wedding, a highschool friend, and then Ghem's wedding, a college blockmate, the first wedding in our block! Tsk! I wish could have gone to all three.
• It just seems funny that people I know are getting married here and there lately, and my dear cousin (on my mom's side, yung pretty na kamuka ko haha) is now sporting a new diamond ring! I just can't imagine it, my beloved cousin, the one I used to spend hours with every night crying my heart out over some corny love aches, the one who knows all my craziness, my childhood playmate, dang! She's engaged! Daya! Haha! Sabi ko sayo ako muna dapat since I'm older than you! Oh well... I'm happy for you nhai!
• I miss Simon. A dear friend who used to work in the same building as mine. We used to meet at the building's fire exit when we're both bored to make chika. He transferred to another office and now I don't have a ciggie bud here. And yeah, it's through him that Schmuck and I met.
• It's confirmed! WB will release the Harry Potter GOF DVD's on March 7! They'll be releasing them in 2 versions: the normal one-disk and a 2-disk special edition that will contain some deleted scenes and cast interviews. But I'm not getting either of the two... I'm buying the 8-disk special! Yup! They're also releasing a collection of all 4 HP's together with a special disk for each so 8 all-in-all! Yey!
• There's a sandstorm outside and its been going on for hours now.
• And now for my bday wishlist:

(first the not-so-expensive material wishes:)

- A lunch box. Preferably in a stylish color that will be okay with whatever office attire I'm wearing hehe!

- A plain black bag, a must-have but dunno why I just don't have one.

- Cutee small ankle socks (if that's what you call them). I just bought myself (a new year's gift) a pair of the cutest Puma shoes, and that's what i need the socks for wehehe.

- Any shiny lipgloss

- Pony tails or scoongies, nice ones that I can use in the office.

- A Palm Tungsten E2 casing

- I actually need a pressed powder and a blush hehe

- Books: The Devil Wears Prada or Narnia (the box collection)

- DVDs: Mean Streets or Casino (both by Martin Scorsese), Scarface (starring Pacino), or a season of the Gilmore Girls

(then my other wishes that I dunno how to classify but will really give me great happiness:)

- A pay raise (this goes out for my boss)

- A Sony Vaio laptop (this one is a typographical error! wehehe)

- To spend half a day in a hot tub, with scented candles all around, reading a book, and sipping wine (preferably a Montes Cabernet Sauvignon).

- Dinner with friends (and I hope I won't have to pay hehe)

- To receive a surprise

- To win any raffle for cash, all expense paid vacations, cruises, or shopping/dinner vouchers

- Visit mom and dad

- For a dream to come true ( I just have this feeling that something's goods about to happen).

Have to get back to reality now... My boss' calling...

Holidays!

It's not often that one gets to have holidays here in the Middle East. Being in a Muslim country, where a normal working week is from Saturday to Thursday, and Friday being what we considered as a weekend, getting holidays every once in a while is really something that everyone looks forward to.

One of the holidays we look forward to is the Ramadan, which usually falls between October and November, it's a whole month of working only until 2pm. But not really that fun when you cannot eat out and drink until evening because the Muslims are fasting, and you also can't go to the mall after work because they will open only around 6pm during these times. But at the end of the Ramadan month we get a 3-day Eid Mubarak holidays.

Then the next holiday will be Christmas, we'll that still depends with your boss hehe. Like in my case I was working last Christmas.

We'll at least they celebrate New Year here, so since I was usually off Fridays and Saturdays, New Year falling on a Sunday was really good for me... a 3-day holiday it was!

Not even rcovering from the holidays, a few days ago another 3-day off was announced, Jan.5-7, due to the sad demise of Sheikh Maktoum, our Dubai Ruler and UAE's Vice President.

So I came to work only yesterday but again tomorrow will be the start of another Muslim Holiday! I forgot the name, it an Eid al-something holiday.. So I'll be off from tomorrow til Friday! 4days!

But this holiday is a little more special because Schmuck's also off during those days. It's not often that we get to spend holidays together. He works in Retail so usually they have work during those times. But it's a good thing his boss finally gave him a holiday.

So we will not be bored for 4days, here are what we are planning:

- play Playstation2 (he'll buy Sims2, Sims Bustin' Out and Colin McRae Rally 2005 later), i'm downloading cheatcodes at the moment haha..

- cook, bake, and eat! i'm thinking of buying an oven hehe..

- read, read and read.. we have to catch up on some readings. I'm downloading ebooks for my pda, but I can't seem to find good ones for free. I love classics anyways. But if you happen to have new ones that you can send me for free, please do so! hehe..

- watch Narnia!

- Pig-out!

- watch DVDs!

It is too cold to go the beach anymore. It is averaging 13'C - 18'C outside. So it will only be home and mall for 4days. Hay, we have to make most of this holiday because there will be no more holidays until the October. See you next week!

I love my bosses!

I just love my bosses right now hehe. Today, we (my 3 Korean bosses, me and another indian officemate) went out for lunch. He asked me to make a reservation at Dusit Hotel, telling me that it will be our year-end party thingy.

So before 12:30pm, we all left the office. I get to ride in our GM's totally awesome Cadillac, hehe.
Then during lunch, my bosses (the GM, Sr. GM and the Mngr) presented us (moi and the indian guy) with what they say is our year-end gifts. I was like, whaaatttt?

First, they gave my indian officemate (who's been working for them for 10years) a Samsung mobile phone, i forgot the model though, but it's that sleek silver one, the hell, all of them look the same hehe.

Then they gave me my gift. As you can see from the pictures, it's the Samsung YP-T7F digital audio player! It's got 512mb, in a totally cool metallic sky blue color, it can play videos, i can view photos, and of course it plays music hehe. It even has a recorder and FM radio.. jeezzz.

I checked it out in the net and they say it costs around $209, or maybe more here. It's more expensive that its Ipod counterpart. And they say it battery can last 10hours.

Now I feel guilty for all those times that I complain about my bosses. =)

Schmuck's Dad

A few days ago, schmuck’s dad was here in Dubai. He stayed for two days, and since both schmuck and I were able to get a day-off last 26th December, we toured his dad around Dubai. Here are some pics:

We first had lunch at Noodle House. It was supposed to be a momentous event as it is the first time ever that schmuck treated his dad for lunch.. hehe. The rest are just pictures taken at Madinat Jumeirah:













That was Burj al Arab, the only seven-star hotel, in the background.

We also went to a lot of other places but I was not able to take some pics. His dad though had taken a lot of pics with his cam, I will show them to you when I get the copies.

It was a fun day, I enjoyed his dad’s company. Sabi ko nga mas cool at saka mas gwapo pa si daddy nya kesa sa kanya haha! I am hoping that his dad, along with his mom, will stop by again on February. Maybe then I can get them a tour inside the Burj.

Christmas @ work

Merry Christmas everyone!

Christmas day! And here I am spending it in in the office haha! I have to work 24th and 25th as I have requested for a day-off tomorrow coz schmuck's dad will be arriving tonight and we want to tour him around Dubai tomorrow.

It was a funny christmas eve for schmuck and I. Since we both have work on 24th and 25th, we both do not have time to cook noche buena and stay out partying late, so we just had an early noche buena, and of all places we ate at Chowking haha! I was craving for kare-kare so we both decided to dine there.

It was really nice how a simple dinner, at a simple place, can turn out perfect with the perfect company and some christmas spirit. Dunno how it happened but we both feel giddy and elated (feels like it really is christmas haha) just walking around the mall and doing some window shopping hehe.

We did the christmas shopping on the 23rd, and that was also fun. We both gave each other unconventional christmas gifts, he gave me a quilt and quilt cover, and i gave him a 256mb flash disk haha. I also bought myself a new pair of high heels and a suede bag. And yeah, i bought myself a Palm Tungsten E2 as my christmas gift to myself, and shcmuck got himself a new Nokia 5140i phone.

I bought my bosses some nice cotton hankies from Bhs, don't wanna give them something that is expensive as I want them to think that i cannot afford buying them anything that cost a lot so they will decide on giving me a raise next year, hehe. Then I gave my health-concious roommates some belgian chocolates to ruin their diets wehehe.

I called my parents last night, got a little sad when my mom told me she misses my steaks during noche buena. I called again this morning as they have a reunion with relative so I was able to talk to almost everyone, from cousins, aunts, uncles and my beloved granny. I was able to call some friends back home yesterday, and it was really nice to chat with them after almost of two years of not seeing them.

Christmas is still not over til tonight, and so far, it had been a great one for me. Better than last year definitely, as now I have schmuck to spend christmas with. I hope you all have have a great christmas too! Happy Christmas everyone!

Foggy Foggy Day!

I’ve been carrying my digicam around lately because I know any moment now the whole Dubai will be covered with fog. I remember it so well last year when I first experienced winter here; and coming from a tropical country where the nearest thing to fog that I can get is the air pollution in the metropolis, seeing the whole city wrapped in this magical white fog is really a sight I really want to capture. So just to be ready, I have the cam always ready.

Then last 6th December, it finally came! So I hurriedly took out my cam, and what do you know! Its battery is dead empty! How thick can I get huh?

Good thing I received these pics in my email so I can share it with you. I can't give credit to the owner of the pics though since it was just forwarded to me. All I know is he/she took the shots from the 33rd floor of the Emirates Tower (just a few blocks away from my office building) at around 8:30am on that beautiful December 6 morning..

Take look at these:

That white building in the right hand side, with that protruding antaenna (if that's what it is) is where my office is. That's the Dubai World Trade Centre. Then that building at the center with four pyramids on top is the Fairmont Hotel.



With the fog effect, it looks like these buildings are really towering in height no? not really hehe.. imagine the one who took that pic was only on the 33rd floor so mababa lang talaga yung fog hehe..



This is Sheikh Zayed Road that day hehe..

But imagine how it was inside that fog. Funny how I was already in front of our building yet I still can't see a thing. Zero visibility hehe. Then this is where my "pagiging inosente" comes in.. pano ba naman, super awestruck ako with smoke coming out of my mounth when I speak hehe. E ano ngayon? E sa walang ganun sa Pinas diba? Basta I know I must have really looked stupid hehe.

My First Costume Ball

Last 2nd December, UPAA-UAE held its first-ever Christmas Party, and what makes it more fun was that they decided on making it a costume ball!

It was a total show of creativity for everyone. And being someone who loves dressing up, I had decided on wearing a flapper girl costume a week before the event. But as it turned out, the costume I had borrowed from a gay friend was too flimsy that I decided to change costume the last minute.

That was the morning of the day itself, and still I’m costume-less. I woke up early that day to head to the nearest mall. Since I already bought a cigarette holder a few days back for the supposedly flapper costume, so I decided to think of something wherein I can still utilize that ciggie holder. So schmuck said I could go as Cruella Deville.

So with that decided, I bought fake long nails, hair spray (to set my hair up ala-Cruella) and white washable hair color (as her hair is black and white). I borrowed a long black dress from a friend and since I cannot find a cheap animal skin coat, I settled for a white boa. With everything all set, I went to a friend’s house to start dressing up.

But it seemed I was never really meant to go as Cruella as another disaster took place. It never really occurred to me that to be able to color your hair white, your natural hair color should be light brown to blonde. So after spraying that white hair color, instead of me having platinum-blonde hair, I ended up looking like an old lady with graying hair. Since I cannot do anything about it anymore as I’m out of time, I just wrapped a turban on my head, and luckily another friend had an extra wig so I was able to change my look around the second half of the party.

Here are the pics:

Kuya Mike in the Samurai costume, moi in what they say was a merge between Grace Kelly and Medussa (though I feel that I look like Professor Quirell) and Kuya Anthon as the Arabo



Moi, Xernes without his Mardi Gras mask, Lucy who supposedly was Reese in Legally Blonde, Galo the Mariacchi, and Janice the tennis-playing, Chinese-hooker looking Marilyn Monroe hehe



Moi in the old-lady look hehe



Schmuck (who insisted on not wearing a costume hehe) and moi (now in wig!)



Charles (cow-girl?), Frando (Abu Sayaf), Josh (Mano Po-look), Simon (Turkish attire), moi and Schmuck

I didn’t won the “Best Costume of the Night” prize but Tinette, who owns the wig I wore, gave me the wig as it fits me better daw hehe. So I still went home happy. Plus I was able to take home some leftovers and bottles of vodka and red wine hehe.

Check this out...

"Fantasya: The Philippine Comic and Story Anthology" published by PSICOM Publishing is now out and can be found in all National Bookstores nationwide.

Please buy your copies and check out the story: The Awakening of Tonnie Seawolf. It was written by schmuck's younger sis. Too bad I can't buy a copy myself, unless you guys wanna send me a copy here.

Riel? I think you have friends who'll be intrested in this. Kindly send them my link.

Buy! Buy! Panregalo nyo sa christmas!

Just a proud sis (???), hehe.

My ode to mom and dad

I’ve been here for almost a year and five months now, and yeah.. I miss mom and dad..

When I first arrived here, I used to call them only every other week. Sometimes it’s my mom who calls me, as she is wondering why I never call her. But lately it had been different; calling them thrice a week is now normal. Must be a sign that I desperately miss them, especially now that I’m about to celebrate my second Christmas alone here.

Looking back, I am thankful to everything that both of them had taught me. Despite my being an only child, I was raised to be independent and self-sufficient. My parents never spoiled me in material possessions, but I was abundantly showered by love, affection and attention. Growing up with no siblings, my parents know that they needed to raise me to be independent because time will come that they will not be there anymore for me, and even if I do not have any “ate” or “kuya” to run to, they feel secure knowing that they’ve raised me well enough to stand on my own and make my own decisions.



A lot of people say that I look like both my parents, the upper part of my face from my mom, the lower part from my dad. I don’t actually know what traits I took after them. Hopefully I can someday be like them when it’s time for me to raise my own kids. I want my kids to look up to me just as much as I respect my mom and dad.

I really miss how “mokong” my parents are. Old as they are (dad’s 56 and mom’s 51), they are still one of the sweetest couple I know. I miss their “lambingan”, hehe. I miss it when my dad will say goodnight to me first before he goes to bed, or how he always gives me the best part of the “bangus” (tiyan hehe), I miss it whenever he says “musta na ang anak kong maganda?” (haha it’s my dad’s fault I’m vain), and how he tickles the sole of my feet when I don’t wanna wake up in the morning.



It’s my mom that insisted I learn to cook and wash/iron my clothes. It’s from her that I learn that I should wait for the vinegar to boil before stirring it so it will retain its sourness, or that putting a papaya stalk while boiling meat will help make it become soft and tender faster than normal. I am still hopeful that I have attained my mom’s green thumb, though the only successful plant I had grown up to date is mongo (yup toge), and that’s even for a science class in grade school haha.

I have acquired my mom’s love for cats, and my “walang pakialamanan” attitude from my dad. Come to think of it, it’s just lately that I realized I look for guys that are exactly like my dad. Someone who will shower me with attention yet will not spoil me, will support me yet will let me decide on my own, and will let me have the best part of the “bangus” hehe.



I miss mom and dad; I hope someday I can tour them out of the country. It’s my mom’s dream to visit the Holy Land, but I cannot bring them there yet, not until I’m out of Dubai as I cannot step back here if I go to Israel or Jerusalem hehe. My mom’s never ridden a plane before so I want her to experience that soon hehe.

I miss you mom and dad, (though you cannot read this because you both do not know how to operate a PC and much more connect to the net) and I love you so so much! I wouldn’t be where I am right now if it weren’t for you guys. Thanks!

Meeting Paulo Coelho...

Damn, I don’t even know how to start.. Okay let me first give you the 4W’s..

When: 16th November 2005, Wednesday, 6pm-10pm
Where: Virgin Megastore, Mercato Mall, Dubai
What: Book Signing
Who: (Ahhh! Wahoo! Yeeeeh! Oh!) Paulo Coelho

My emotions are taking over hehe, I’m having a hard time expressing everything. Ok, calm down, inhale… exhale…

Now, let me start:

The book signing was scheduled 6pm-8pm only, with only 3 books allowed per person. Since Schmuck and I will be coming from work (plus the traffic and the seemingly absence of cabs when you urgently need one), we arrived at Mercato at about 10minutes to 7pm. And the scene that greeted us was overwhelming. A long queue of people (hundreds I believe) was there, media, camera flashing here and there.. It was really uhm.. disorienting.

So I joined the queue while schmuck went around the store to get some chismis, and he found out that by 8pm (em punto!), the signing will stop. I was crestfallen when I heard about it. But still that did not discourage me, as Schmuck always tells me: Patience is a virtue hehe!

(My Paulo Coelho Books!)

So when 8pm came, they announced that Coelho will take a break (to get a hand massage or something hehe) but he will still resume signing after it. (Yey!) We were also informed that there would be another signing session on the 19th in another mall. So some people decided they’ll just go there, but since schmuck and I both have work that Saturday, we decided to stay.

Tummy grumbling (almost 9pm and we haven’t had dinner yet), legs getting numb (I’m in heels), and fatigue finally sinking in, we still stayed. I’ve waited long enough hehe so I might as well wait some more. Though Coelho said he’d try to get all books signed, I still can’t be at peace, not until I’m in front of him. There are still like more than a hundred people in front of me (with 3 books each), and it’s almost 9pm, and the store closes at 10pm.. arghh.. I was actually getting discouraged already but not everyone gets an opportunity like this so.. I stayed.

So after another hour (it’s almost 10pm then) and 3 more hand massage breaks for Coelho, I can actually now see him, it’s like there are now only 20 people in front of me. Yey! Coelho decided that instead of us approaching him to his table, he’d be the one to come to our line. So we open all our books to where we want the signature placed and waited.

Let me first tell you something, at about 7:30pm, since there are too many people who wanted their book signed. Coelho decided on just writing his signature, no more dedications, no more dear blah blah, so he can clear up the queue faster. So when my turn finally came, he’s in front of me na! Coelho as in Paulo Coelho! Hehe! Then his pen runs out of ink! Haha! Blooper! So he asked his assistant for a new pen, so I waited and made chikka. He asked me where I’m from, I was actually thinking of saying I’m from Latin Asia (it’s what a gay friend used to say so that it sounds sosyal haha), but I said I’m from the Philippines anyway. I told him it was really kind of him to extend the book signing, blah blah, and then the pen finally arrived.

Then he suddenly told me something that will forever be etched in my memory:

“You know what, whenever my pen is new, I love writing something long..”

So there I was, my mouth open in disbelief as he wrote something that up to now I still can’t understand. I asked him if it’s in Spanish, he said it’s in Portuguese (stupid me, he’s Brazilian! Of course it will be in Portuguese!). Then I told him that the only Portuguese phrase I can remember is “Boa noite” (Good evening) and “Boa tarde” (Good afternoon), and he laughed at me hehe. Paulo Coelho laughed at me, Ahhhhh! Hehe! Then before I go, he said it was a pleasure meeting me, and I was floating on air since then hehe..

(Coelho signing my books, as people crowd around us)

Everybody crowded around me after, just to see what Coelho had written and telling me how they envy me, ahhh! I was the only one there to get something long written in my book, all of them had only signatures or maybe Dear Blah and that’s it! I was ranting and ranting till the next morning, the giddiness was actually still there every time I remember it hehe.

(Schmuck getting his sis' book signed)

(My signed "By The River Piedras I Sat Down And Wept")

(My "Veronika Decides To Die" also signed!)

(My treasure! My "The Alchemist")

I still haven't translated it, I think it's a religious verse or something.. In case any of you can get it translated for me.. Just give me a buzz!

Tsk.. Tsk...

I am disappointed… I’ve been so looking forward to the Goblet of Fire movie, only to find out today that it will be released here in Dubai on the 21st December.. tsk..

Even Chronicles of Narnia will be released next year pa.. arghhh..

* * * * *

By the way, last Wednesday (16th Nov.) something worth blogging happened.. hehe. I can’t start ranting about it just yet as I left my cam cable back home so I cannot upload the pictures.. I wan’t pics to support my story hehe..

Hint: The Alchemist!

* * * * *

It rained this morning, the first after a lifetime of scorching desert heat. That can only signify one thing: winter’s here! Wahoo!

* * * * *

A few more weeks and it’s Christmas again. I heard some Christmas carols from the TV the other day and it somehow made me feel homesick again. I remember how I used to anticipate Christmas back there in the Phils. And now here I am, to celebrate my second Christmas alone. Tsk.. I hope Schmuck and I will not have work that day so we can somehow celebrate Christmas.

Hay, I miss home. I used to be the one who prepares the Christmas dinner. It’s just saddens me more to know that my mom and dad will again be a twosome this Christmas. I being an only child, I know how hard it is for them to celebrate without me. Sad, sad, sad...

Of the Eid holidays and being sick...

The past two weeks had been a bad one; I called in sick from work for 5 days and the rest of the Eid holidays I spent in bed sick still.

The week before Ramadan ends, my ever-recurring urinary tract infection (UTI) attacked again (attacked ba yung gamitin na word?). So I was in bed the whole week, under medication, complaining about my back pain, and all the other UTI complications that I need not and will not elaborate on.

So when Eid finally arrives, I’m feeling much much better, the infection (I believe) is finally starting to clear, when I started having fever. I’ve so looked forward to the holidays, with plans of going places, out of town maybe, when there I was, in bed, wrapped up, having chills, nursing a 38-40 degrees fever… arghh..

Then when I started feeling a little better, it’s schmuck who got sick. Maybe he got it from me after taking care of me. So he was the one who then have to call in sick for 2 days. He was diagnosed with viral fever, which explained it as we only have this very high fever, yet we have neither colds nor cough..

So schmuck is okay now, we both go to work again. But I still have this “puta” fever, I call it that way as it only comes out at night haha. The whole day I’m fine yet late afternoon till early morning I experience the chills and high fever. That can be bad.. I should really ask the doctor’s opinion, I don’t know. I just have this phobia of consulting doctors. Basta..

Kainis, what an uneventful holidays that was, except for the one day when we both felt okay and we decided to get some sun by the beach. We both missed the beach hehe.

I’ll just look forward this weekend. I have my eyes on that grilling pan and wok at IKEA and planning on cooking something nice for schmuck. Damn, if only I can get some red wine. Kainis, getting alcohol here in Dubai is really hard. You can either buy outside Dubai where its legal to sell alcohol, which is like a 3hour drive naman or you can settle na lang on those liquor stores here where a bottle would be triple the normal price, plus you must have the license to buy one, which I don’t have. Fine, sparkling water it is then..

Yey, it’s Thursday na tomorrow, wahoo!

3 months, but who's counting?

I just wanna post this pic.. schmuck took it, and i do not have any idea that he's taking our pic. I thought he's just looking at the pics i have taken in the cam.. that's us, in our pambahays on a normal weekend..

I'm tired of life here...

This may sound like a bratty spoiled kid caught up in her own little world.. but this my blog so i don't really give a damn.

I'm tired of Dubai. I can't see myself and my career flourishing here anymore. I want to go somewhere else. I want to start anew.

I'm not happy with my work anymore, it's too routinary for me (though i know i'm far blessed than a lot of people who do not have a job at the moment). I hate my wardrobe, i've outgrown everything in there (yeah i know it's such a simple thing to blabber about as there are tons of people who would wish to have what i have in my closet). The only thing that keeps me going at the moment are my dreams (for my family and career) and schmuck.

I know why i'm feeling this way, i know why i'm itching to leave this place.. it's because i know that despite the fact that i already excel here, i know that i can excel further somewhere else.

My options? Anywhere in Europe will be fine. Hopefully i won't be here anymore by the end of next year. Then, i'll start again. I'll try getting a job in research or PR, then i'll start writing again. Then who knows, if i enjoyed life there, i might settle there, and start a family...

It's good to know that schmuck shares the same views... he's itching to leave this place too.. we'll just leave it to fate. If we're meant to be somewhere else together, then who am I to complain? It couldn't be any better hehe. =)

One gimik night...

Isang gabi... nagkasama-sama ang mga bading ng UPAA... nagkalasingan, kwentuhan.. at kodakan.. bwahahaha...

Kailangan naka-pout lagi ang kumare nyo.. nagfe-feeling eh...

At ito si Paris Hilton, kasama si Tinkerbell... (joke lang ateng..)

Nagpasa ako ng resume wehehehe!

Note: Tagalog mode ulit upang protektahan ang sarili saka-sakaling ang amo ko pala ay nagsu-surf at may blog din..

Okay naman sa kompanya kong to. Di man ako properly compensated sa dami at antas ng trabahong ginagawa ko, e masasabing pupwede na. Kumbaga di ka kuntento pero pede nang pagtiyagaan.

Kasi nga mabait ang mga amo ko (crush nga kasi ako hehe), tapos parang wala na kong balak lumipat pa ng bagong trabaho kasi balak kong makipagsapalaran sa Europa by next year. E kung lilipat pa ako ng trabaho dito e di bagong kontrata na naman yun na 2years, e sawa na nga ko sa Dubai. Kaya parang mas mainam na tapusin ko na yung kontrata ko sa present company ko at saka ako sumibat ng malinis ang record ko..

Pero...

Oo, di ko mapagkasya ang sahod ko.. kumbaga pag inalis ko na yung bayad sa kuryente, tubig, bahay, padala sa pinas, transpo at pagkain e ang matitira sakin e pambili na lang ng yosi at isang fonecard, asan ang ipon ko? wala. Kaya nga ni pambili ng ticket pauwi e wala ako hehe.. May naitabi naman ako, pero kulang pa siyang ticket papuntang Europa.

Isang taon mahigit na ko dito, pero nahihiya akong lumapit sa amo ko at humingi ng increase sa sahod.. ewan ko ba! Pero kanina, habang nag-aayos ng dyaryo ng amo ko, nasulyapan ko ang classified. Mula nung napasok ako dito ay di ako naghahalungkat ng classified kasi nga parang pinaniwala ko ang sarili ko na okay na ko sa ganito. Pero out of the blue kanina e bigla siyang sumagi sa mata ko, at ang una ko kaagad nakita e opening para sa isang executive secretary ng GM! Usually naman deadma lang ako sa ganyan pero nung nakita ko yung sahod na inoo-offer nila, aba e napaisip ako.. 17,000aed? e wala pa sa 1/4 nun ang kinikita ko.. Imagine? 255,000php a month?

Feeling ko naman di ako qualified e, feeling ko kailangan nila e yung tipong sampung taon ng nagtratrabaho dito, tapos may MBA, tapos tipong US o UK educated, puti, hindi handwritten ang passport gaya natin, blah blah.. in other words e masyadong bigtime yung sahod para mapansin ang isang hamak na tulad ko! (pinulot ka lang sa lupa, bwahahaha!)

Pero malay natin... baka ma-type-an ako nung GM, gusto nya pala bata hehe. Kaya nagpasa ako ng resume! Ewan, basta nagtrip lang naman ako e. Di naman ako umaasa na masho-shortlist ako e. Basta kasi jologs yung resume ko (cv tawag nila dito). E pano kung napili ako? Diba?

At least wala akong what ifs, hehe!

Hmm.. ano nga kaya no? Hehe!

Dating an older guy...

I've dated older men before, like this British guy i used to go out with who's 4 years older than me, or that computer graphic artist who's like 3 years above my age. But my relationships with these guys never really worked out. The ones that last are those with guys younger or more or less my age. Like my 2 ex-boyfriends (both a year younger than me), the first one lasted for 9 months, the other for 2 1/2 years.

I used to think that my relationships with older guys don't work out bacause the age gap makes it hard for us to relate to each other, being from different generations. But then again, i was wrong, don't you just love it when your proven wrong? hehe..

Schmuck's older than me, as in way way older than me, he's 7 years older. We've been together for more than 4months (2months yung official hehe), and yet i don't see any problem. But who said anything about it being easy?

I now realized the difference between dating an older guy and a "mature" older guy. And me being a spoiled-rotten only child who's used to getting things my way, not to mention a used-to-be controlling bitch of a girlfriend (to my exes) and knows i can get away with anything just by using my charm or the teary-eyed paawa effect, damn it's really hard adjusting to this. (i can see schmuck now, laughing his guts out, he loves it when i make reklamo, that prick, hmmmp!)

Okay, what's the point of writing all this? I'm gloating.. hehe.. Teka, funny lang, i'm having a hard time, yet i'm not quitting. I'm not getting things my way, yet i'm staying. I'm not being spoiled, yet i'm still happy with schmuck's and i's relationship. HALA! Does that mean i'm starting to get a little more mature? Haha! (knowing schmuck, his reaction to this will be" "Yeah right, mature? You? Na-ah!)

Ano ba yan i lost track, back to my gloating.. it's really hard. We never fought that much, actually we more likely have what we both call civil disagreements. But if ever we have this shouting bouts, which is very rare talaga, there are only 2 topics we fought about. First is the "seeing each other a lot" issue. I'm used to being with my bfs most of the time, as in most of the time (well most girls are anyways), but he's not (with his preious gfs ha?). So we've agreed to just weekends together. I agreed half-heartedly hehe, i still try charming my way to see him during weekdays, but it doesn't work. He won't tolerate me hehe. I'm too spoiled already daw. This issue actually resulted to our first major away, which naulit pa ng pangalawa, but i'm not going for a strike 3 (if you know schmuck, you know what strike3 means). Ayaw na hehe. I'm starting to get used to it hehe..

Aside from this "seeing each other a lot" issue, the only other issue that starts our disagreements is when i crave for attention. I used to hate it when he's with me yet his mind's at work. But that i'm used to now, having a career-driven workaholic bf who's married to his work, i should better get used to being the mistress hehe.

But other than those 2 issues, we don't have any other problems. I am so thankful that he tries to understand me, kahit i'm being difficult most of the time. But i'm trying, and we both know this relationship will work out. It won't be easy, pero ganun e, we made this commitment to stay together, so no matter how difficult it could get, we must still try to put up with each other. Di pala dapat try, we should put up with each other pala. (yes you heard me right, put up is the right word)

Ayan, i remember some instances that somehow shows how schmuck is and why i still choose stay with him.

-When i ask him if he loves me, he'll said: Yes i love you and all your bad habits

-When he does something infuriating, and i say that i hate him, he thanks me, making it sound that hating him is a compliment. (i love and hate him at the same time)

-When he's so exhausted from work, he'll hug me tapos hingang malalim then say: Haaay inner peace!

But its not really what he says or what does that endears him to me. Those things are just bonuses. I just chose to stay coz i wanna stay I wanna stay coz i love him. And i love him coz i do, i don't know why, i just do.

Don't I look so pinay?

Tagalog mode ulit ako..

Sa 23 taon ng pamumuhay ko sa mundong ibabaw (yup sa ibabaw!), ni minsan di pumasok sa hinagap ko na ako ay hindi mukang pinay. Mula sa aking medyo may kalaparang ilong, aking di katangkarang height, di kaputian at kakinisang balat, basta over-all impact at audience impact pa, sure akong ako'y mukang pinay.

Pero sa mahigit isang taon kong paghuhukay ng langis sa disyerto ng Dubai, ilang ulit na akong napagkamalang ibang lahi, at minsan ng kapwa pinoy ko pa ha?

Eksena 1, Lokasyon: Office
May pumasok na pinay, naghahanap ng trabaho, inii-ingles ang beauty ko, e di sabi ko: "Ateng wala kaming vacancies." Nagulat ang kumare mo, marunong daw akong magtagalog, sabi ko na lang gaga pinay ako, kasi daw kala nya e Koreana.. Ganun?

Eksena 2, Lokasyon: Supermarket
Nasa isang asian section ako ng supermarket, naghahanap ako ng wasabe paste ng biglang may lumapit sa aking intisk at iniintsik ako, aba malay ko naman sa kanya.. e hindi pala marunong ng ingles kumare mo kaya, ngumiti na lang ako, sasabihin ko sana ching chang soo pancit bihon siomai canton.

Eksena 3, Lokasyon: Beach
Nagbibilad na mala-daing ang lola nyo (ako yun). Naka-two piece, naka-shades na retro na super fake (Cucci ang tatak wahaha), at nagbabasa ng libro. Isang tropa ng mga jologs, meaning mga limang lalaking naka-pahinante look (aka basketball jersey at shorts with matching reflector shades), medyo may kalakihan ang mga tiyan ang naka-spot sakin. Deadma ang sosyalerang bading pero na-overheard ang chismisan ng mga hip the lup (hiphop na amoy lupa).

Jologs 1: Pare? Tignan mo yung babae o.. Lapitan natin..
Jologs 2: Sira hindi ata pinay e. Pinay ba?
Jologs 1: Hindi koreana ata e.
Jologs 3: Hindi indonesian yan o malaysian
Jologs 2: Ayoko baka mamaya di pala pinay e.

Kasi naman pano iisipang pinay e madalang ang pinay na nagtwo-two piece, kaming mga nag-iinarte lang ang naggaganun sa bansang arabo, tapos nagbibilad pa e ang pinay takot sa araw at ayaw umiitim. Kaya ang daing na nagfe-feeling, nagpanggap na lang tulog.

Eksena 4, Lokasyon: Cafe Havana

Naghahapunan kami ng aking "bitter" half, tapos ang waiter na pinoy na nagseserve samin ay ingles ng ingles, deadma ako, kala ko ganun ang patakaran sa kanila e. Tinawag ko siya: "Kuya? Pakuha na po nung bill." Natameme ang lolo mo, sabay tanong kung pinoy kami, kasi daw ako mukang koreana tapos si schmuck naman mukang hapon. Kaloka!

Disclaimer: Hindi ako Chinese, Korean, Malaysian, Indonesian, Singaporean or Hapon. Ako ay Espanola! Si! Si! Me llamo Maria Graciela Carreon y Castro. Yo soy Andaluciano. Charing! Haha! Pangarap kong maging espanola, gusto kong tumira sa Mother Spain. Ay ang taray, pag pala nakatuluyan ko si schmuck super espanola-sounding ang pangalan ko.. Maria Graciela Segovia! Ang ganda! Parang nobility! Kung di man papampon na lang ko sa nanay nya para makuha ko yung apelyido nila, hehe.

Ramadan at ang Dakilang Tagatimpla ng Kape...

Nasa mood akong magsulat sa Filipino, para at least maligaw man ang amo ko sa blog ko e hindi nya maiintindahan yung sinulat ko tungkol sa kanya.

Teka maiba muna ko, mamaya na yung sa amo ko, kwento muna ko. Tagal ko ring di nagblog ah, kasi wala akong maisip na kablog-blog sa buhay ko lately, payapa siya masyado, at kadalasan ang payapang buhay ay hindi nagki-click sa takilya.

Ngayong araw ang simula ng ramadan. Nakakaloka sa dami ng bawal. Pero unahin natin ang magandang dulot ng ramadan. Isa-isahin natin:

Positibo:

-Mas maikli ang oras ng trabaho. Ang dating 8-5 ngayon ay 8-2 lang, mas maaga uuwi! hehe. Isang buwan na ganun, at buo ang sweldo!

- Walang masyado traffic sa umaga kasi ang mga govt. offices/bangko 9am ang pasok so di ko sila nakakasabay hehe..

-Tahimik ang kalsada

-Mababait ang mga lokal (arabo), di ka huhubaran ng tingin at bawal ngayon yun.. bawal sa kanila ang sex, bisyo (yosi at alak), kumain at uminom (from 5am-6pm), blah blah blah...

Negatibo:

-Bawal pahuli ng kumakain ka from 5am-6pm. So ayun at nagtatago pa ko para lang kumain at uminom. May biskwit ako sa bag ko na kinukurut-kurot ko, sabay takip ng panyo sa bibig hehe.

-Isipin mo kahit sa loob ng sarli mong sasakyan at nakita kang umiinom ng tubig e paparahin ka at magkita na lang tayo sa presinto, tsk tsk.

-Sarado ang mall maghapon, gabi na magbubukas, mga 5pm tapos bukas hanggang 3am hehe

-Bukas mga fastfood pero panay takeouts lang.

-Walang banda sa mga bars.

-Bawal magyosi sa labas, basta bawal kang makita na nagyoyosi.

-Bawal affection, ultimo holding hands bawal, nak ng tokwa schmuck magtitigan na lang tayo, hehe.

Ayan isang buwan yan, tapos sa Nov. 3-5 ay Eid Mubarak Holidays, so walang pasok at sandamakmak ang sale, goodluck sa akin at wala akong pera.

Balik tayo sa kwento tungkol sa amo kong koreano. Langya type ata ako, kaloka. Kasi pinatawag ako kanina, ano daw ba ang tingin ko sa paghahain ng kape sa kanya, akala ko naman dahil ramadan kaya siya nagtatanong so sabi ko, ok lang na magkape ka basta wag sa harap ng mga muslim. Pero hindi daw yun, ok lang daw ba na ako ang mag-serve ng kape nya at ng mga bisita nya, kasi gusto nya daw ako ang nagbibigay ng kape sa kanya. Bakit daw kasi yung office boy ang nagtimtimpla ng kape nya, e di sabi ko na yun ang trabaho nung office boy, nasa job description nya na magtimpla ng kape e, at minsan kapag ako ang nagtitimpla, nag-iinsist talaga siya na trabaho nya yun at siya ang magtitimpla, so fine, go, sayo na ang pantry! Ikaw na ang dakilang Starbucks. Pero wag ka, pinatawag ng amo ko ang office boy at sinabihan na kapag sa kanya, ako ang gagawa ng kape. Kaloka! Personal Secretary nya ko, tagagawa ng sulat nya, taga-ayos ng schedule nya, taga-book ng trips nya (flight at hotel), taga-ayos ng golf bookings nya, tagabayad ng tuition fee ng mga anak nya, taga-schedule ng doctor's/dentist's appointment ng mga bata, tagabayad bills nya, tapos ngayon pati kape nya ako pa? Gusto nya lagi ako nakikita e. Hmmm...

Tapos eto pa isa: Eto ang usapan namin kanina, tinagalog ko lang pero ingles dapat yan na putol putol, kasi nga koreano siya hehe.. G ay ako at MP ay si Mr. Park (hindi nya daw kaano-ano si Sandara):

G: Sir, pede ko bang i-avail yung bakasyon ko ngayon November, mga 10-15 lang..

MP: Bakit? Anong espesyal na okasyon?

G: Plano ko sir pumuntang Turkey?

MP: Para san? Business?

G: Hindi po, bakasyon lang.

MP: Sino kasama mo? BF mo?

G: Opo (ay tanga bakit ko sinabi)

MP: E papano airfare mo?

G: Sagot ko, mura lang naman di bababa ng 1000, ticket na saka hotel ng 3gabi

MP: Talaga? O sige pag nakuha mo na itenerary mo bigay mo sakin.

G: Bakit po?

MP: Gusto ko ring pumunta.

Hala yan, sasama pa ata ang mokong na singkit na to, bahala siya, sa arte nyang yun e ewan kung sumakay siya ng chartered flights at magstay sa 3star hotel. Basta ako lulubusin ko ang bakasyon na yun, mahigit isang taon na ko dito at kailangan na ng sistema ko ang bakasyon. Basta pag natuloy, una kong pupuntahan ang Hagia Sofia, tapos ang Topkapi Wall, pag may oras pa sa Troy na din at Euphesus. Balita ko malamig dun sa November, as in di daw kaya ng pacute kong mga jackets. Dapat siguro makapunta na ng Brands for Less at ng makabili ng thermal clothes hehe.

Ayan na nga bang sinasabi ko, tinatawag na ko, kape daw ulit! Arghhh!

Schmuck's Birthday Surprise

Yesterday was schmuck's birthday, and i cooked up a little surprise for the birthday boy. Luckily i'm off every Saturday and since he's at work, i'm free to plan and prepare the surprise.

So i first went to the grocery and bought all the stuff i'll be needing, then i headed to his flat and prepared everything before he comes home from work. So i cleaned up the house first, did his laundry, decorated the place, and prepared the dinner. Here are some pictures:

I filled his place with balloons, candles and rose petals. I also placed three roses and some more petals in his welcome rug. His reaction when he entered the room was overwhelming, i'll never forget that smile and that glow in his eyes.

Let me brag a little (sorry i can't help it hehe): for dinner we had mushroom soup first, then for the main course i prepared country fried steak with milk gravy and mashed potatoes, plus some baby carrots and corn as side dish. And what else is perfect with steak? Chilean read wine!

For dessert: tiramisu! I asked him to make a wish first before blowing the candles. Funny how he just stood there, eyes closed, concentrating hard on his wish. I took him like 30 seconds before he opened his eyes again, dami namang wish nun...

Goofing around after dinner hehe..

It turned out to be a happy birthday after all... Sabi nya, hehe.